Lovely Bones and Beating up Bad Guys

Don't you ever want to beat up the bad guy? Or at least hinder the bad guy. Who hasn't silently urged a character not to go into the villain's house or not to get into the car or run faster?  "Get away from him! Run and don't look back!!" Better yet, have you ever wanted to punish the villain yourself?

Sometimes I imagine stories ending differently. I like to replay scenes in my mind, changing the plot at pivotal moments. For example, in the scene in The Lovely Bones where the "neighborly" serial killer lures Suzie Salmon into his underground lair, I imagine someone (myself, actually) driving up, blowing the horn, making a bunch of noise, getting out, and interrupting the murder, sending little Suzie home running scared. I say something like, "I know who you are. I know what you are." My hand is holding a handgun (am I a cop in the fantasy?) and I don't take my eyes off of him. Somehow I bind him and call the cops, never taking my eyes off of him. Maybe I even beat the guy to a pulp while I wait.

I don't know why I picture it like this. It is silly for obvious reasons (it assumes I would even be able to stop the bad guy without having myself and the other killed), but why do I think this? Perhaps it is my sense of "manliness." That is, I should be able to control things, to keep bad things from happening or to make things right (like Suzie's dad), not wanting to feel weak, unable, incompetent, or whatever. I've never been in a fight, so maybe this is an outlet for frustration and past resentment. Perhaps it is a sense of justice, though the feelings and imagined actions are far from "Christian virtues." More likely, it is my sense of justice. "This is how I think it should happen. This is how I think the villain should be punished."


The problem is this: we just don't have that kind of control. Satan wants us to think we do have control, however. Thus, we dwell on the past, dreaming on "what might have been." Instead, we should try to accept the current situation, acknowledging our inability to change the past, and realize that we can only change our attitude and response. But this is easier said than done.

Last year my dad cut down a tree at my grandfather's house. The tree fell, somehow rolling back toward him, but when he tried to step back or aside he tripped, fell, and the tree rolled on top of him, the pressure of which cut off his breathing. My grandfather was there. He's about 80 and tried to get the tree off but couldn't, finally having to yell for help. The ambulance didn't get there in time.

Sometimes, though, I imagine what would've happened had I been there. I picture myself suggesting that Dad cut the tree at a different spot, causing the tree to fall in a different direction. Or I see myself pushing him out of the way when the tree starts to roll. Or I see myself receiving some unnatural strength and rolling the tree off him. Such thoughts do no good but only serve to fabricate a false reality that merely distracts from living.

Listen to little Stoic wisdom:

Some things are in our control and others not. Things in our control are opinion, pursuit, desire, aversion, and, in a word, whatever are our own actions. Things not in our control are body, property, reputation, command, and, in one word, whatever are not our own actions. 

The things in our control are by nature free, unrestrained, unhindered; but those not in our control are weak, slavish, restrained, belonging to others. Remember, then, that if you suppose that things which are slavish by nature are also free, and that what belongs to others is your own, then you will be hindered. You will lament, you will be disturbed, and you will find fault both with gods and men. But if you suppose that only to be your own which is your own, and what belongs to others such as it really is, then no one will ever compel you or restrain you. Further, you will find fault with no one or accuse no one. You will do nothing against your will. No one will hurt you, you will have no enemies, and you not be harmed. 

Aiming therefore at such great things, remember that you must not allow yourself to be carried, even with a slight tendency, towards the attainment of lesser things. Instead, you must entirely quit some things and for the present postpone the rest. But if you would both have these great things, along with power and riches, then you will not gain even the latter, because you aim at the former too: but you will absolutely fail of the former, by which alone happiness and freedom are achieved. 

Work, therefore to be able to say to every harsh appearance, "You are but an appearance, and not absolutely the thing you appear to be." And then examine it by those rules which you have, and first, and chiefly, by this: whether it concerns the things which are in our own control, or those which are not; and, if it concerns anything not in our control, be prepared to say that it is nothing to you. (Epictetus, The Enchiridion 1)

I certainly can't change the past. I can't even change the present...only my attitude and perception. When bad things happen, I just have to trust God, who will make all wrongs right.

Beloved, never avenge yourselves, but leave it to the wrath of God, for it is written, "Vengeance is mine, I will repay, says the Lord." (Rom 12:19 ESV).

Justice will be dealt. Perhaps not as quickly as you want it, but it will come. My Dad wasn't murdered like Suzie Salmon, but Jesus will avenge him by destroying death itself (1 Cor 15:26). That gives me peace.

The Lovely Bones was pretty morbid, but the message was real. Bad things happen but you have to let them go and move on. Though He may not have been in the minds of the author or director, God must be trusted to make things right. He is the One who is able. He is the One who is just.